A fridge light only works when you are not looking.
Every drawer has one thing in it that nobody can explain.
Toast always lands butter side down. Always. Even when it is dry.
The kitchen is where honesty goes to live. Open the fridge at midnight and it tells you exactly who you are: a person with three mustards and no bread.
The junk drawer is a museum of decisions. A single key, a birthday candle shaped like a seven, and a battery of unknown charge. You will keep all of them forever.
Soy sauce, for the record, is true in every kitchen. This is why the Emporium has its name.